hey guys,
I'm off to work in a few minutes, but my Kitty just shared a little webcomic with me, and I think it's pretty damn good. It's called Strings of Fate, and it's a love story crossed with the Chinese Zodiac, kinda like Fruits Basket but not.
Well, I'd go into more depth, but I really gotta go now.
Check it out here!
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
Sunday, June 27, 2004
Blogger ads are windows to your soul...
While tinkering with the new template I used for this blog, I realized that the little Blogger ads on top can be thought of as a personality meter. Blogger takes note of the little things that you write on each post, reading into your interests and subconscious and using that offer you products that will most likely interest you.
Fascinating.
Okay, so I blame my strange sleep schedule for thinking that up, but hey, it gives people something to ponder whenever they see the ads on their blogs...
Fascinating.
Okay, so I blame my strange sleep schedule for thinking that up, but hey, it gives people something to ponder whenever they see the ads on their blogs...
Friday, June 25, 2004
Thursday, June 24, 2004
Surprise, surprise...
Well, talk about a big surpise.
I get home from work this morning, trying to sort out some overseas family stuff involving ebay and credit cards and I find an email from the Webster's Online Dictionary saying that a few stories I've written have been picked to be part of their references to modern literature on the use of a few words.
All I can say is, wow. I know it's still not the same as a written page in it, but at least now I can say that I'm in a dictionary. :D
If you're interested, they're over here and here.
I get home from work this morning, trying to sort out some overseas family stuff involving ebay and credit cards and I find an email from the Webster's Online Dictionary saying that a few stories I've written have been picked to be part of their references to modern literature on the use of a few words.
All I can say is, wow. I know it's still not the same as a written page in it, but at least now I can say that I'm in a dictionary. :D
If you're interested, they're over here and here.
Monday, June 21, 2004
New Horizons
If you guys are wondering on the sudden change of description on my blog, it's a little about how I feel right now. After my birthday and all, and with my new job and the change in my home life and the experiences I've had, I think it's time for me to get to work.
I'm realigning my Chakras, finding my source, seeking enlightenment, sailing for new horizons and questing for the Holy Grail. Not necessarily in that order, and more often all at once.
I've had enough fooling around. My mistakes are done and over with, and my experiences will always be a part of me. Now it's actually time to work towards Maslow's favorite part of his heirarchy.
Self-Actualization.
While it's true that I'll still have to contend with everything else in that damn heirarchy, I feel more than a nudge towards seeking something else. Call it ambition or madness, but I can sense that there's something waiting for me, beckoning me to find it.
I feel like an Arthurian knight errant, lost in the woods with nothing but his steed, and his sword, and faith in the existence of the Holy Grail.
I can't define my Holy Grail to you, to be honest, because I can't even define it to myself as of yet.
I just know that it's there.
And that somehow, all is right with the world.
I'm realigning my Chakras, finding my source, seeking enlightenment, sailing for new horizons and questing for the Holy Grail. Not necessarily in that order, and more often all at once.
I've had enough fooling around. My mistakes are done and over with, and my experiences will always be a part of me. Now it's actually time to work towards Maslow's favorite part of his heirarchy.
Self-Actualization.
While it's true that I'll still have to contend with everything else in that damn heirarchy, I feel more than a nudge towards seeking something else. Call it ambition or madness, but I can sense that there's something waiting for me, beckoning me to find it.
I feel like an Arthurian knight errant, lost in the woods with nothing but his steed, and his sword, and faith in the existence of the Holy Grail.
I can't define my Holy Grail to you, to be honest, because I can't even define it to myself as of yet.
I just know that it's there.
And that somehow, all is right with the world.
Quick Quiz for the Bored
| How to make a Jay Steven Anyong |
| Ingredients: 3 parts success 3 parts self-sufficiency 1 part ego |
| Method: Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little fitness if desired! |
Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com
Haha! Now all I have to do is to make this come true... shouldn't be too hard. At least I know I've got the ego part down pat. :p
Wednesday, June 16, 2004
Revisiting some old Vignettes
Well, since I had nothing else better to do, here are a few old stories I've written in my old web journal. I figure that I might as well move them here for redundancy, and as a reminder for me to keep writing.
It's funny how you read something you've written from before, and realize how well you actually wrote them, or how badly they turned out after all. :p
---
Despair by Jay Steven Anyong
"Greetings," spoke the old sage, his snowy beard trembling with his quavering voice, "what dark thoughts ail you, young man?"
I turn to look at him, dressed in the luminous robes of a scholar, holding a long inkbrush as tall as I was, "Hello, Great Sage." I greet in response, "I was merely musing about the nature of despair."
"Ah." The old man nodded slowly, "Despair... such a powerful emotion for the young."
"For the young?" My eyebrow shot up, "Explain yourself, Great Sage."
"Despair is at it's most powerful, when one experiences it for the first time." the Great Sage said, sitting down with some difficulty on a small rock beside me.
"The first time?" I snorted, "That's comforting. You've only informed me that there will be others."
"Verily," the Great Sage replied, "There will be many more times when you will be awash with despair and hopelessness... however, there is a lesson to be learned in all our experiences."
"And this lesson is...?"
"That despair, while seemingly overwhelming, is but a passing shadow to one who looks towards the light." The Great Sage replied, looking out into the horizon, "Only cowards turn to violence upon others and themselves in the grip of despair. True virtue shines in those who brace themselves and conduct themselves with humility, grace, honesty and love, for those four are what will give you the strength to bend with the storm of despair and grow with it's passing."
I listened quietly, my heart and mind at war with each other.
The Great Sage looked at me and smiled, "My words are of little comfort, as they should be, young man. For my words cannot grant you humility, nor grace, nor honesty nor love. These can only come from you."
I nodded. My mind agreed, and my heart sighed with sadness.
The Great Sage was right. Mere words cannot take me away from my despair. Like an alchemist, I must seek to rise above the base and ascend to the divine.
I bow low to the Great Sage, and hoist my pack over my shoulder looking out into the coming storm.
----
Cold Shower by Jay Steven Anyong
He sang.
Throwing his head back, his eyes squeezed shut, feeling the icy water of the shower biting into the skin of his bare chest, he sang.
He sang a song of loneliness and of heartbreak even as he bowed his head, feeling the sharp sting of cold water on his scalp, before trickling down and raking his back like little claws, trailing their way down from his shoulders to the small of his back.
Warm tears streaked down his face as his voice cracked, a soft sob escaping his lips as he took a shuddering breath to sing the next line. The warmth of his tears washed away by another icy blast of cold as he reached the chorus.
He opened his eyes, forcing them to focus as the cold gripped him tighter. He sang harder, his voice getting louder as he looked down at the blood seeping down the drain, swirling around like a little crimson whirlpool.
He gasped, his next breath seemed so hard to draw...
He sang softly as he felt his knees give, and the razor fell from his hand, clattering on the bleached white tiles of the shower floor, as he finally felt his voice waver, no sound coming from his mouth.
He gave a sad smile as he felt his vision begin to fade, ending his song with her name, lost in the sound of the icy cold water hitting bleached white tiles
It's funny how you read something you've written from before, and realize how well you actually wrote them, or how badly they turned out after all. :p
---
Despair by Jay Steven Anyong
"Greetings," spoke the old sage, his snowy beard trembling with his quavering voice, "what dark thoughts ail you, young man?"
I turn to look at him, dressed in the luminous robes of a scholar, holding a long inkbrush as tall as I was, "Hello, Great Sage." I greet in response, "I was merely musing about the nature of despair."
"Ah." The old man nodded slowly, "Despair... such a powerful emotion for the young."
"For the young?" My eyebrow shot up, "Explain yourself, Great Sage."
"Despair is at it's most powerful, when one experiences it for the first time." the Great Sage said, sitting down with some difficulty on a small rock beside me.
"The first time?" I snorted, "That's comforting. You've only informed me that there will be others."
"Verily," the Great Sage replied, "There will be many more times when you will be awash with despair and hopelessness... however, there is a lesson to be learned in all our experiences."
"And this lesson is...?"
"That despair, while seemingly overwhelming, is but a passing shadow to one who looks towards the light." The Great Sage replied, looking out into the horizon, "Only cowards turn to violence upon others and themselves in the grip of despair. True virtue shines in those who brace themselves and conduct themselves with humility, grace, honesty and love, for those four are what will give you the strength to bend with the storm of despair and grow with it's passing."
I listened quietly, my heart and mind at war with each other.
The Great Sage looked at me and smiled, "My words are of little comfort, as they should be, young man. For my words cannot grant you humility, nor grace, nor honesty nor love. These can only come from you."
I nodded. My mind agreed, and my heart sighed with sadness.
The Great Sage was right. Mere words cannot take me away from my despair. Like an alchemist, I must seek to rise above the base and ascend to the divine.
I bow low to the Great Sage, and hoist my pack over my shoulder looking out into the coming storm.
----
Cold Shower by Jay Steven Anyong
He sang.
Throwing his head back, his eyes squeezed shut, feeling the icy water of the shower biting into the skin of his bare chest, he sang.
He sang a song of loneliness and of heartbreak even as he bowed his head, feeling the sharp sting of cold water on his scalp, before trickling down and raking his back like little claws, trailing their way down from his shoulders to the small of his back.
Warm tears streaked down his face as his voice cracked, a soft sob escaping his lips as he took a shuddering breath to sing the next line. The warmth of his tears washed away by another icy blast of cold as he reached the chorus.
He opened his eyes, forcing them to focus as the cold gripped him tighter. He sang harder, his voice getting louder as he looked down at the blood seeping down the drain, swirling around like a little crimson whirlpool.
He gasped, his next breath seemed so hard to draw...
He sang softly as he felt his knees give, and the razor fell from his hand, clattering on the bleached white tiles of the shower floor, as he finally felt his voice waver, no sound coming from his mouth.
He gave a sad smile as he felt his vision begin to fade, ending his song with her name, lost in the sound of the icy cold water hitting bleached white tiles
Half-Dazed Zombie; Nerd Toys and Mage: the Ascension
Well, it looks like my body clock hasn't completely adjusted after all. I'm awake two hours early typing out this blog trying to figure out how to knock myself out into lala land again.
Oh well. Since I'm here anyway, might as well make my half-awake state useful.
----
You're a Speak & Spell!! You nerd, you. Just
because you were disguised as a toy doesn't
mean you weren't educational, you sneaky
bastard.
What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Great. I'm a Nerd Toy.
----
Well, then again I am technically a Gamer Geek, so I guess I'm not really offended. Heck, I play RPGs and miniatures games and all sorts of other stuff that people would consider to be "toys". (Okay, minds out of the gutter to those who are thinking of other toys right now.)
Heck, I guess proof of this would be the fact that my favorite game , Mage: the Ascension, deals with heavy Philiosophy and a lot of high weirdness, conspiracy theories, religious conflict and the power of the singluar world view.
The basic premise of the game is this:
If you realized the spark of divinity within you, and found that you could use it to rewrite reality... what would you do?? Would you take advantage of it to make yourself rich? Will you solve world hunger? Would you explore the extent of your abilities? will you make yourself into a celebrity? Would you pimp yourself out to first world countries?
That's what Mage is about. :) It's about people who've found the ability to alter reality, and the things they have to go through in pursuit of their goals. Be it power, love, happiness or salvation. :) A little heavy on the reading, but excellent stuff. :)
oh, and just out of curiosity, if you guys are interested, can you guys take this quiz and tell me what you guys got? I think I can learn a lot out of the results of these. Most of the Game Bandits and Kirsikka already know the results they want, but I'm also curious about the guys who don't play Mage
You are a Euthanatos, bound to the Wheel of
Fortune. Others label you a "death
mage", but they do not see the necessity
of destruction, or how it allows new creation.
That is the burden you must bear, along with
the tragedy of Jhor: hold up your faith in your
vocation, lest you lose sight of your reason
for being, or worse, become a mindless killer.
You stand on the knife's edge, balancing
between extremes; your will must be strong
indeed to balance the universe with you in the
face of ridicule.
Which Tradition Mage Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Oh well. Since I'm here anyway, might as well make my half-awake state useful.
----
You're a Speak & Spell!! You nerd, you. Just
because you were disguised as a toy doesn't
mean you weren't educational, you sneaky
bastard.
What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Great. I'm a Nerd Toy.
----
Well, then again I am technically a Gamer Geek, so I guess I'm not really offended. Heck, I play RPGs and miniatures games and all sorts of other stuff that people would consider to be "toys". (Okay, minds out of the gutter to those who are thinking of other toys right now.)
Heck, I guess proof of this would be the fact that my favorite game , Mage: the Ascension, deals with heavy Philiosophy and a lot of high weirdness, conspiracy theories, religious conflict and the power of the singluar world view.
The basic premise of the game is this:
If you realized the spark of divinity within you, and found that you could use it to rewrite reality... what would you do?? Would you take advantage of it to make yourself rich? Will you solve world hunger? Would you explore the extent of your abilities? will you make yourself into a celebrity? Would you pimp yourself out to first world countries?
That's what Mage is about. :) It's about people who've found the ability to alter reality, and the things they have to go through in pursuit of their goals. Be it power, love, happiness or salvation. :) A little heavy on the reading, but excellent stuff. :)
oh, and just out of curiosity, if you guys are interested, can you guys take this quiz and tell me what you guys got? I think I can learn a lot out of the results of these. Most of the Game Bandits and Kirsikka already know the results they want, but I'm also curious about the guys who don't play Mage
You are a Euthanatos, bound to the Wheel of
Fortune. Others label you a "death
mage", but they do not see the necessity
of destruction, or how it allows new creation.
That is the burden you must bear, along with
the tragedy of Jhor: hold up your faith in your
vocation, lest you lose sight of your reason
for being, or worse, become a mindless killer.
You stand on the knife's edge, balancing
between extremes; your will must be strong
indeed to balance the universe with you in the
face of ridicule.
Which Tradition Mage Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Monday, June 14, 2004
Welcome to the night life...
Well, it looks like I've pulled off part of my sleep pattern modification program, having spent the entire night awake until now. I'll hit the sack at around 6 or so, and hopefully my body will get enough sleep to prepare me for the night shift training that's starting tonight.
I've had some time to think about what I wrote last night. I guess I needed to blow off some steam... Thankfully the blog is designed for this kind of stuff. At least I don't have to take up too much of other people's time with my bitching. :p
So to make up for it, here's a cute and simple strip from Sinfest!
I've had some time to think about what I wrote last night. I guess I needed to blow off some steam... Thankfully the blog is designed for this kind of stuff. At least I don't have to take up too much of other people's time with my bitching. :p
So to make up for it, here's a cute and simple strip from Sinfest!
Sunday, June 13, 2004
Tilting at windmills for all the right reasons
No sleep
No sleep until I'm done with finding the answer
Won't stop
Won't stop before I find the cure for this cancer
Sometimes I feel like going down, I'm so disconnected
Somehow I know that I am haunted to be wanted
I've been watching, I've been waiting
In the shadows for my time
I've been searching, I've been living
For tomorrows all my life
In the shadows by The Rasmus
----
Sometimes I wish that I could change the world.
Sometimes I feel that I could take away pain.
Sometimes I think that I can give all the answers.
Sometimes I'm told that I'm just fooling myself.
It's hard living a life where you just want other people to be happy. I've always been accused of being too much of a pushover and of trying too hard to please everyone. I think that they might be right.
I get twinges of guilt when I see someone I consider to be a friend struggling through a situation. I feel the call to reach out and help in any way possible...
Even if it may be wrong for me to do so.
Maybe I'm a wimp. Maybe I'm a pushover. Maybe I find gratification and some semblance of place in the world by the way that I am percieved. Perhaps this is all a little selfish streak in me that wants to be noticed and praised for being a good little boy. Or it could even be the plain vanilla explanation that I just want to help.
A good friend of mine dubbed it the "Hero complex". I think she hit it right on the head. There's a little buzz you get when you help people out, and there's a corresponding pain of guilt when you feel that you're responsible for someone else's suffering.
Maybe I should learn to care selectively.
That might do the trick.
Care only when it is convenient to do so.
Help only when you will not lose anything while doing so.
Listen to those who would be able to repay you for your kindess.
Expect something in return.
Yeah, right.
I'm not like that.
No sleep until I'm done with finding the answer
Won't stop
Won't stop before I find the cure for this cancer
Sometimes I feel like going down, I'm so disconnected
Somehow I know that I am haunted to be wanted
I've been watching, I've been waiting
In the shadows for my time
I've been searching, I've been living
For tomorrows all my life
In the shadows by The Rasmus
----
Sometimes I wish that I could change the world.
Sometimes I feel that I could take away pain.
Sometimes I think that I can give all the answers.
Sometimes I'm told that I'm just fooling myself.
It's hard living a life where you just want other people to be happy. I've always been accused of being too much of a pushover and of trying too hard to please everyone. I think that they might be right.
I get twinges of guilt when I see someone I consider to be a friend struggling through a situation. I feel the call to reach out and help in any way possible...
Even if it may be wrong for me to do so.
Maybe I'm a wimp. Maybe I'm a pushover. Maybe I find gratification and some semblance of place in the world by the way that I am percieved. Perhaps this is all a little selfish streak in me that wants to be noticed and praised for being a good little boy. Or it could even be the plain vanilla explanation that I just want to help.
A good friend of mine dubbed it the "Hero complex". I think she hit it right on the head. There's a little buzz you get when you help people out, and there's a corresponding pain of guilt when you feel that you're responsible for someone else's suffering.
Maybe I should learn to care selectively.
That might do the trick.
Care only when it is convenient to do so.
Help only when you will not lose anything while doing so.
Listen to those who would be able to repay you for your kindess.
Expect something in return.
Yeah, right.
I'm not like that.
Saturday, June 12, 2004
In tribute to the Batman Family
I've always thought that the coolest thing in mainstream comic books was the Gotham universe. Here's a little pic showing the current crop of people which are making waves in Gotham, though I have to admit that Catwoman's new "goggle" costume seems a little... off to me. Also included are some of my other favorites, Barbara Gordon as the Oracle, Tim Drake as Robin, Nightwing and Helena Bertinelli as the Huntress.
I'm actually rather tempted to see if I can dig up the Hush storyline sometime.
Friday, June 11, 2004
24 and going...
Great, 24 now and still going. :p
I guess nothing much to write about honestly, aside from the fact that I've managed to get my co-worker's deadjournal address and I'm putting it up on my sidebar as a link. Shar's a pretty cool girl, and from the looks of it, she does poetry a hell of a lot better than I do. Which is probably also why I stick to prose.
For other links, here's Lara's website. Lara was our instructor for the Sykes Core Skills Training module, and it turns out that she's friends with more than a couple of AEGIS people, Adrian, Nabs and Tommy Lim. Small world, I guess.
---
I really should get back to writing. Maybe living with only the night to guide me will help out in bringing the angsty, moody, and melodramatic stuff out of me. ;) I'll end up as a coffee zombie, with dark circles under my bloodshot eyes, my hair haggard and unkempt, drooping over my face as I walk down the streets of Makati.
I can't wait.
Then again, I have to admit that Gothic stuff has it's appeal. I'm not a full goth by any means, but I find the culture fascinating. Then again, I'm a big fan of the whole World of Darkness, so big surprise, right?
I guess nothing much to write about honestly, aside from the fact that I've managed to get my co-worker's deadjournal address and I'm putting it up on my sidebar as a link. Shar's a pretty cool girl, and from the looks of it, she does poetry a hell of a lot better than I do. Which is probably also why I stick to prose.
For other links, here's Lara's website. Lara was our instructor for the Sykes Core Skills Training module, and it turns out that she's friends with more than a couple of AEGIS people, Adrian, Nabs and Tommy Lim. Small world, I guess.
---
I really should get back to writing. Maybe living with only the night to guide me will help out in bringing the angsty, moody, and melodramatic stuff out of me. ;) I'll end up as a coffee zombie, with dark circles under my bloodshot eyes, my hair haggard and unkempt, drooping over my face as I walk down the streets of Makati.
I can't wait.
Then again, I have to admit that Gothic stuff has it's appeal. I'm not a full goth by any means, but I find the culture fascinating. Then again, I'm a big fan of the whole World of Darkness, so big surprise, right?
Thursday, June 10, 2004
A small message of thanks
Hey guys!
It's my birthday today, and I'd just like to take a little time to post a great big THANK YOU to everyone around me, for being there, and making me happy to be alive this day, and looking forward to the future. :)
It's my birthday today, and I'd just like to take a little time to post a great big THANK YOU to everyone around me, for being there, and making me happy to be alive this day, and looking forward to the future. :)
Tuesday, June 08, 2004
Sudden updates...
Hey guys!
Been a little busy to actually post stuff over here thanks to getting into Sykes as a Customer Service Representative. The training's pretty extensive, and the actual Product Training is going to take a few more weeks.
---
Seeing Alex's menu of games, I figured I should list mine as well...
Games I'm running:
Ravenloft: Chronicles of the Penitent
Legend of the Five Rings
Games I've started:
Exalted: Hammer of the Gods
Adventure! - Z is for Zeppelin!
Games I plan to run:
Mage: the Ascension
Not much yet, but I'd better get to finishing them eventually. :)
Been a little busy to actually post stuff over here thanks to getting into Sykes as a Customer Service Representative. The training's pretty extensive, and the actual Product Training is going to take a few more weeks.
---
Seeing Alex's menu of games, I figured I should list mine as well...
Games I'm running:
Ravenloft: Chronicles of the Penitent
Legend of the Five Rings
Games I've started:
Exalted: Hammer of the Gods
Adventure! - Z is for Zeppelin!
Games I plan to run:
Mage: the Ascension
Not much yet, but I'd better get to finishing them eventually. :)
Wednesday, June 02, 2004
Now this is cool...
You are most like Robin! A leader and fearless by
nature, you tend to dive straight into
something without thinking. You have a hard
time trusting your friends sometimes and you
are extremely serious when you have to. You
don't like being compared to someone you are a
rival with and sometimes your temper gets the
best of you. Out of all of your friends you
might be the one who dreams to be leader or is
the leader. Whatever the reason sometimes you
need to look before you leap.
Which Teen Titans Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
----
Hehe, I've always thought Robin was cool. :) Thanks to Mitchie-Pooh! for the quiz. :)
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